Hatred, lying and slander

Proverbs 10:18 Hiding hatred makes you a liar; slandering others makes you a fool.

I remember when I was a little girl. While I didn't have the best influences in my life at all times, I will never forget the advice I got from an adult: Even if we don't actually lie about something, keeping something from someone is just as much a lie.

Ouch! Even today, those words ring in my ears. There are times that keeping information from someone would be okay, like surprise birthdays or events. I remember asking my husband not to tell me the sex of our first child. He knew for several months and never told me.

But what this is talking about is being "two-faced". I think of our youth group. 130 middle school girls makes a great recipe for drama. I can't tell you how many times I hear girls say "oh, she's here". It breaks my heart. Mostly because several minutes later, they are all in a group and ACTING like they are best of friends.

I don't think it is right to go up to someone and let them know everything you don't like about them, but I don't think you should huddle in a group and deceive them either. Are there times that you may have put on a mask around others and made them think you liked them? Is there anyone in your life you hate? I know I have been there. Not so much anymore, but there was a time in my life where I really hated a few people. When we try to conceal our hatred, we end up lying. If you have hatred towards someone today, ask God to work in and through that situation.

Slander, yuck! How many of us has been wrongly accused of something? What about when someone has said something about us that was not true? Have there been times that you have said something about someone else that wasn't exactly true, to find out later that it was wrong information? This is damaging to the other person as well as yourself. You will be made a fool when you say things that are not true. I know that there are a few things that have been said about me recently and it has gotten back to me. What a damaging thing for all involved. Not only does the person who slandered look bad, but it infects all those who have heard the lies and the one that is being slandered. What does slandering do to our witness?

Several years ago we were in business with someone else. Eventually, we parted our ways. Unfortunately there was a lot of pain involved and it did not end well. Each of us said things that were not right. Weeks later, we got a letter from a lawyer that informed us that we had been reported for slander. I was shocked, while we wanted to tell everyone what happened and how it happened, we kept our integrity (it was really hard to do). Eventually it came to light who had spread the lies. The damage was done, though, and pride had set in. No one was willing to forgive. It took several years and Dale and I both felt the need to write an apology letter. We didn't expect anything in return, therefore we did it for the intentions of truly granting forgiveness to them. It is not our responsibility to convince them to forgive us. Granting someone forgiveness is our responsibility. What they do with it is theirs. Free yourself today and truly forgive those that have wronged you.

John 20:23
" If you forgive the sins of any, their sins have been forgiven them; if you retain the sins of any, they have been retained."

Mark 11:25-16
"Whenever you stand praying, forgive, if you have anything against anyone, so that your Father who is in heaven will also forgive you your transgressions. [" But if you do not forgive, neither will your Father who is in heaven forgive your transgressions."]

What can we do today to make sure that we are honest with others and ourselves? How can we live a life of integrity and hold our tongues so that we are lifting others up? Make an effort today to be honest, trustworthy and above reproach.

Dear Lord, I pray that we will all make a commitment today to live a transparent life. Help us to break the barrier of pride and pain. Help us to work towards restoration of past hurts and to forgive those who have wronged us. Lord, if there is hatred in our hearts, in our actions, please cleanse us, make our hearts pure and help us to be a good witness of your unfailing mercy. We love you, Lord and know that it is because of you that we have been shown great mercy and because of our faith in you, we should be willing to extend mercy to others as well. Thank you, Lord.

Please continue to pray for Diana B. this week.