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It is time to pursue and create a little peace. Some forms of bitterness may take more work then others. It is time to step out in faith and know that God wants you to be an example of his truth, he desire for you to live a life of blessing and peace.
One of my biggest frustrations as a Christian is that I have felt like in some situations I should just take other peoples cruelty and forgive them. I don't know if this expectation was simply in my head or set by example by those around me. It is a common misconception that turning the other cheek means you are giving people the right to abuse you. In truth, in the time of Jesus, turning the other cheek would mean putting yourself on an even field of respect with someone. Standing your ground. Confronting situations doesn't mean being weak or fighting fist to cuff. It is about drawing boundaries and counting yourself as worthy of respect.
Why the rambling about confrontation? One of the greatest foods for bitterness is anger, frustration and hate. When you don't know how to deal with these emotions the minute they arise, will you bury them? Do you pretend the hurt really isn't there?
Pursue peace.
~Anger/hurt? What do you do when a friend or loved one uses profanity at you? Calls you cruel names or insults your family? I know, these are the type of people in our lives that are just easier to walk away from. What would happen if you asked them to stop? It is time to draw one of those boundaries that are necessary for peace in life. You will find that when you raise your expectations of people they will usually rise to the occasion. If they don't it is time to lovingly let them know that you deserve to be treated better or you will have to restrict the time you spend with them.
~Dysfunctional family. I know many of us are poster children for dysfunction. This is a very personal area for me and bitterness. I have carried the hurt of my childhood around with me for a very long time. I have been attempting to make my own peace in this area of my life since I became a mother. Don't be discouraged, a lifetime of hurt takes a little longer to work through. Bitterness can be a very deep root and sometimes we have to starve it a little at a time. At some point you have to be the one to stop the cycles in your life. Stand up for yourself and say enough is enough.
Creating peace
~Envy. So now it is time to realize that when you look at other peoples lives and start to get a little jealous you are missing out on your own blessings. If you are envious of someone's marriage, it is time to find out what they are doing and you are not. This one is all about you. We always want to change our spouse, wonder why they don't do more in the marriage. If you are bummed about getting the short straw, that will effect your marriage. So, create the marriage you want. Yep, time to start putting in the effort. Regardless of what your spouse may be doing, people usually respond well when the environment around them is positive and peaceful.
~Coveting. I think this one doesn't get talked about nearly enough. It is hard to watch others get the things you want. It isn't fun to see the neighbors take amazing vacations every year, while you don't remember the last time you took a vacation day. The problem is, we forget to be good stewards of what we have been give. Create peace by finding contentment in what God has given you. Are you missing your own blessings while you feed the bitterness in your life?
Creating and Pursuing Peace in the Church
This is the responsibility of all of us that are a part of the Body of Christ. Bitterness runs deep in the modern Christian church. I wish I knew the exact steps to take to improve it all. I know in my heart that it is important as believers that we understand our role.
Take time to reflect on your role, are you carrying bitterness because of some hurt that has come from the church. This causes a block for people to know the grace of God. It is time to step up, confront your pain and start creating peace. If you are responsible for being consumed by ritual and causing bitterness in new believers, it is time for you to start pursuing peace. Don't forget we are all works in progress and even though you have been a believer for your entire life, some of us need your guidance and not the bitterness that comes from a lifetime of church politics.
If you are a new believer or not one yet and look around and wonder why, if we are saved by a loving merciful God, we all pretend to be perfect. Remember to put your trust in God and that all of us need him, that is why we are all in church. Hypocrisy will always be a part of the church because we set standards that we can't meet. We were created to need God, our imperfections remind us how important Christ's death really is. All of us should take a moment and realize we need to be pursuing peace in the church and not our pride.
The cure to bitterness is peace. It is time to stop pointing fingers at everyone else. Take as much responsibility as you can to say, I will deal with this today. I will not feed a root of bitterness in my life. It is time for action, time for confrontation, time for pursuing and time for creating.
Heavenly Father~ Your forgiveness, love, mercy and grace are so amazing. You pursue me and guide me. I need to do some weeding in my life Lord. I need you to be my strength when it is time to confront people. I need your power and comforting when I deal with the pain in my life. I need to see and be thankful for the blessings you have given me. Lord, give me the strength to stand up and make the first move in my relationships. Help me Lord to be a person that is creating peace in my marriage, my friendships and my church. Lord, help me to learn to forgive the wrongs that have been done against me. Reveal to me Lord the practical and active ways I can be a light for you. ~In your precious holy name...
Carry each other"s burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ. Galatians 6:2
Heather and I feel that God has put a genuine desire in our hearts to share His word with people. This blog is our attempt to get the Word of God to our friends in a practical and loving way. We are hoping to create a community of people that strengthen one another for the Kingdom of God. No matter where you are in your walk you are welcome here. Please feel free to share prayer requests, opinions, questions or anything that you feel led to say.
Thursday, August 7, 2008
Bitterness Day 4
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Labels: bitter, boundaries, church, confrontation, coveting, create, envy, hurt, peace, pursue
Wednesday, August 6, 2008
Bitterness Day 3
What do we do when we have let our anger, jealousy, envy and hurt well up into bitterness? We renew our minds. It is time to change our focus. Acknowledge the things that cause bitterness in your life. Yep, all that unresolved anger from your childhood is causing you trouble and it is time to deal with it.
There really isn't a moment where bitterness comes from Spirit. But we know the Spirit that dwells in us rose our savior from death. I know it is powerful enough to help us heal from the hurt we have buried deep down inside of us.
Lets look at the Word:
James 3:13-18
Wisdom from Above
13Who among you is wise and understanding? Let him show by his good behavior his deeds in the gentleness of wisdom.
14But if you have bitter jealousy and selfish ambition in your heart, do not be arrogant and so lie against the truth.
15This wisdom is not that which comes down from above, but is earthly, natural, demonic.
16For where jealousy and selfish ambition exist, there is disorder and every evil thing.
17But the wisdom from above is first pure, then peaceable, gentle, reasonable, full of mercy and good fruits, unwavering, without hypocrisy.
18And the seed whose fruit is righteousness is sown in peace by those who make peace.
When we have bitterness in our lives we are lying against the truth. As the scripture from Hebrews 12 says, It causes trouble and causes people to fall short of the glory of God. Both passages give us an answer though. It does mean doing a little something but I know we can do it.
"....make peace."
"pursue peace"
Bitterness will not go away because you hope, wish or pray it away. It requires a little action on your part. Yep, you have to deal with all those emotions, it is time to cut off the food supply to that terrible root. You have one of two choices here, you can pursue peace and be chasing after it. Or, you can make peace and create it. Let us grab hold of the power that dwells within us and become creators and pursuers of our own peace.
I pray that you have been spending a little time in reflexion over any bitterness that may dwell in your life. Tomorrow we will look at practical "how to" steps to create peace in our lives. God bless you all.
Please continue to pray for Verla K this week. Remember to email us your Praises, Prayer requests and testimonies.
